Thinking about not leaving my desk at work today

I slept for three hours last night, have been to the bathroom at least 5 times in the last 3 hours, am suffering from a moderate hangover, and my co-workers have not stopped shouting since I got in the door.

This is, more or less, no different than any other Saturday morning for me. The big difference between this morning and every other Saturday morning at work for me is that I discovered a large-enough-to-cause-concern hole in the crotch of my pants.